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How can I make walking with a limp funny?

How can I make walking with a limp funny? Topic: How can I make walking with a limp funny?
June 17, 2019 / By Cole
Question: Sometimes, I have a limp from lupus and rheumatoid arthritis. I get asked (alot) "Why are you limping?". I want to be able to answer with something funny and sarcastic lol. Starting off with "I'm not limping, I'm ______". Any thoughts? For more info, I'm a 34 year old female in the south ;). Please have fun with this!! I would love to reply with something great the next time I'm asked.
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Best Answers: How can I make walking with a limp funny?

Archibald Archibald | 9 days ago
I'm not limping, I'm practicing alternative walking. I'm not limping, I'm choreographing a routine for the next Grammy Awards Show. Would you like to audition? Because I have lupus and rheumatoid arthritis. What's your excuse? Am I limping? Oh, thank goodness! I thought I was falling really, really slowly / . . . I thought we were having an earthquake. To you it's a limp - to me it's an Aerosmith song and I get a royalty every time somebody asks me that dumb question. (Then start singing "Walk This Way.") This one's tough to do, but effective. Look that schmuck square in the eye, and say haughtily, "Why do you ask?" Very effective when combined with a calm, icy stare, which takes practice but is worth the effort. No one should be asking you this question. You have a right to be annoyed.
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Archibald Originally Answered: How does running and walking make you lose weight?
Running, if you do it the right way will will shed pounds of fat quickly by increasing your metabolism! The right way is to get your heart rate to a minimum of 80% of your maximum. Now the best way yo burn fat & increase your metabolism is with High intensity interval training otherwise known as HIIT which is doing intervals of high intensity cardio of up to 100% maximum heart rate for a short period followed by a rest period of walking or light jog until your rest period is up I do 30 secs high intensity sprint on treadmill set at 10.5 mph for 30 sec, then turn it down to 5 mph for 1 min & I do 5 sets which sends my metabolism racing for hours after my workout. Now walking and jogging are good for general health they are basically better than doing nothing! Now as for the dip wad that says you will only lose weight in your legs ya I gave that person the big thumbs down, now do yourself a favor and go to rippednaturally.com and click the link at the bottom about cardio and learn the truth! I hope this helps you out
Archibald Originally Answered: How does running and walking make you lose weight?
the muscles in your legs are being worked so they stat burning off fat. The reason you lose weight is because your thighs are the heaviest part of your body and when you work the musles hard enough (when you feel burning and your legs start to wobble at the end of excersise) fat is being burned for energy for your body to keep going. Walking and running only helps reduce weight in your legs.

Tricia Tricia
Next time people ask why you are limping, tell them you are getting practice to act like you have a rubber leg. Or you could act like you have a crutch, and act like it is a rubber crutch and REALLY stress the limp and swoop - this should be rather entertaining. You could also suggest there was an invisible pothole, and they need to be careful not to fall in the ruts. How about a leprechaun is upset with you cause you have his gold, and he is whacking your legs incessantly. lol. Have fun with it. Good luck, Hope this helps
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Salli Salli
"Be-BOPPIN", thats the way kids in the Ghetto's in NY walk, they are immitating some "THUG" Rapper ! They think they're "Rappers"...was it accompanied by "YO, PEEP DIS YO" ? you have to walk like that to keep your pants from falling down, "Aren't you HIP YO ", Every phrase must begin, and end in "YO". It is very common for white kids from good professional family's in suburbia to portray, and act like a hostile inner city youth, who is impoverished, "It's COOL" !
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Salli Originally Answered: Funny Jokes for a ginger.?
What's the difference between ginger pussy and a bowling ball? You could eat a bowling ball if you had to. A Doctor goes into a hospital ward to see a pregnant lady, who has had terrible stomach cramps and fears for the unborn child... "Well, my dear, there's good news and bad news. We've run some tests and the bad news is that your baby has ginger hair." "Oh no!" she replies, "what's the good news?" The Doctor replies, "it's dead." What's the difference between a ginger and a brick? The brick gets laid. Apparently, in about 70 years there will be no more newborn kids that are naturally ginger. See, even Mother Nature hates them. What do you call a redhead whose phone rings on Saturday night? Shocked. What do redheads miss most about a great party? The invitation. How many gingers does it take to change a light bulb? None, they prefer to sit in the dark.

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